As You Slept
by Cyri's Alter Ego
Summary: There are some things that can only be said while you are upside-down on a roof, watching your partner sleep. Yumikkaku, written for Souret.


_I promise, How To Beat Near is in progress. This is just a slight deviation into the Bleach fandom in the meantime._

_This is a fanfic requested by Souret, who is a big fan of Bleach. She's also quite lazy, so she's liable to read this and not review. So we can all frown upon her if she doesn't happen to review. Since she requested this and everything. Yes, Souret, I _am_ blackmailing you :D REVIEW, PLEASE._

_I don't own Bleach. So I write fanfics. Like this._

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**As You Slept**

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Yumichika found Ikkaku's sleeping, upside-down face very interesting.

No, it wasn't beautiful. Yumichika had heard lots of stories about how serene and peaceful sleeping faces looked, but that wasn't really the case with Ikkaku, sadly enough. Actually, his nose was squashed against his arm and his mouth was wide open, giving him a look not unlike a pig.

Not beautiful in the least.

It was also upside-down, but then that was Yumichika's fault for looking at it while lying upside-down on the roof. They were in the human world, and they were supposed to be searching for some unruly Hollow, but as it turned out, this particular Hollow's 'unruliness' didn't stretch to it deigning to turn up, and after a while Ikkaku and Yumichika had given up to just lie in wait on this roof. Yumichika wasn't sure when Ikkaku had fallen asleep, but it hadn't done much to alleviate his own boredom.

Yumichika studied Ikkaku again. He was so _very_ bald. However much Ikkaku tried to deny it, Yumichika had spent more time than could be dutifully explained away staring at the back of Ikkaku's head, and he could confirm that not even one little hair was brave enough to grow there.

Still, baldness presented forth a whole host of opportunities which, personally, Yumichika felt Ikkaku was silly for not taking advantage of. He would look very good with a red wig, thought Yumichika idly... or maybe a nice classy dark blue...

Slowly, Yumichika rolled over until he was face-to-sleeping-face with Ikkaku in the crook of the roof. He propped himself up on his elbow.

"You're not very pretty," he told him out loud. Critically. "You haven't chosen a very flattering position to sleep in. You're snoring. And virtually drooling, you realise? And your _nose_... Oh, come here."

Exasperated, Yumichika leaned forward and gently lifted Ikkaku's face off his arm. Delicately, he rearranged his slumbering friend so that he looked less like a warthog and more like an Ikkaku. He nodded in satisfaction.

"That's better," he said. He eyed Ikkaku's open mouth. "Well. Marginally. I mean, I'm really getting the urge to kiss you right now and it _would_ help if your mouth was closed like a normal person..." He bit the inside of his mouth, pausing tentatively. "...But that's okay, I guess, 'cause I don't even know _why_ I'd want to do that..."

Ikkaku's face remained blankly oblivious. Yumichika looked carefully at it. This was probably the seventh or eighth time he had confessed while Ikkaku was asleep. It had now run past 'I hope he doesn't wake up' into 'I hope he _does_ wake up and give me a freaking answer', but Ikkaku always slept like a log, and Yumichika knew that it was a stupid, cowardly thing to think anyway.

"Eh. You're an idiot," Yumichika mumbled, stretching out onto his back, and he wasn't sure whether he was talking to Ikkaku or himself.

Hōzukimaru was sheathed across Ikkaku's back, but as Yumichika spoke, Ikkaku shifted, and the Zanpakutō shifted with him. The scrape of the sword in its sheath caught Yumichika's sharp ears, and he sat up swiftly at the same moment that Hōzukimaru fell.

Yumichika reacted instinctively, whipping around and catching Ikkaku's Zanpakutō without thinking before it could plunge downwards off their roof. It was only once the sword was in his hand that he froze.

This was Ikkaku's.

This was Ikkaku's Zanpakutō.

This was a manifestation of Ikkaku's _soul_.

And it was here, here in his hands.

Slowly, and with a corner of his bottom lip between his teeth, Yumichika turned Ikkaku's Zanpakutō over. It was dormant, sealed, quiet as a mouse, the blade smooth and polished. Like a sleeping dragon.

Now this was a creature who was beautiful when it slept.

It was only a moment later that a surge in spiritual pressure alerted Yumichika to the presence of another creature. He gripped Hōzukimaru's hilt tightly, forgetting for a moment that it wasn't his Zanpakutō he was holding. No doubt Ruri'iro Kujako would whine at him later for that. His Zanpakutō could be such a brat.

He really hoped that it wasn't that Hollow.

There was a great roar, and a deathly pale creature resembling a gigantic, hairy boar lumbered around the corner. Its eyes were slitted behind its narrow, pointed mask.

Ah. That would be the Hollow.

"Fantastic," muttered Yumichika. He turned. "Ikka-"

"Damn, what'd I miss?"

Yumichika had forgotten that Ikkaku sometimes awoke just as abruptly as he fell asleep. The eleventh squad's third-seater didn't even pause to rub the sleep out of his eyes as he leapt up, grabbed the Zanpakutō that was lying beside him without even glancing at it, and jumped down from the building with no more than a shout.

"C'mon, Yumichika!"

Yumichika looked at the Zanpakutō that Ikkaku was holding.

And then he saw what was still in his own hand.

...Oh.

"Sh-" Yumichika curled his fists, feeling the surface of the wrong weapon, the weapon meant for Ikkaku, under his fingertips. Unless he was very much mistaken, its spiritual energy was growing distinctly annoyed, apparently discontent with the way its owner was disregarding it. Swiftly, Yumichika darted after Ikkaku. "Ikkaku, we've got the wrong-"

But Ikkaku wasn't listening. Facing the Hollow, which had now noticed the two Soul Reapers and looked none the happier for it, he brandished Yumichika's Zanpakutō. "_Grow, Hōzuki_-" His expression changed into confusion as he suddenly noticed how different it looked. "What the-"

"Ikkaku!" bellowed Yumichika.

Ikkaku snapped around, but the Hollow had seen an opening in his hesitation. It charged at them, roaring and grunting and forcing them apart. Yumichika tried to duck past it, but the Hollow's jaws sliced the air inches away from him and he flinched back.

"Ikkaku!" Yumichika tried again. "I've got your-"

"Noticed!"

"_Well_." Yumichika raised his thin eyebrows.

The alley they were in was narrow, and the Hollow seemed to have decided that its best move would be to keep the distance between the two Soul Reapers. There was no room to pass around its short, stocky legs, and they couldn't fight without Zanpakutō. Ikkaku gritted his teeth.

"Right," he muttered, tensing with Yumichika's Zanpakutō. "No stupid Hollow..." He leapt, pushing off the wall with one foot, "...is gonna get the best of me!"

The Hollow screeched in fury and lunged for Ikkaku. Sharp teeth caught in the folds of his shinigami robes. Yumichika cried out and dashed towards him, but the Hollow blocked his way with its vast bulk and dragged Ikkaku to the ground.

Ikkaku grunted, trying to rip himself free. "Damn-" He kicked at one of the Hollow's legs and attempted to scramble upright, but in another second the Hollow's great foot had descended upon him with a crunch.

Yumichika's shriek split the air.

"IKKAKU!"

Satisfied, the Hollow stepped backwards. "Soul Reaper," it snorted throatily.

In an instant Yumichika was at Ikkaku's side. "Ikkaku- Ikkaku! You're okay, aren't you? Yes, you're fine. Tell me you're fine, Ikkaku. Please. Please?"

He was lying still, so still. He might have been sleeping once more. How could Yumichika ever have thought that he wasn't beautiful? He _was_ - battered and bruised, bloodied and torn. Crushed into the dust. Weak. Defeated.

And so, so beautiful.

He stirred and coughed, and tried to raise his head. Then he screwed up his eyes and swore. "I hate Hollows," he growled. "Why didn't it kill me?"

Yumichika was hit with a rush of relief and anger. "_Kill_ you-" he spluttered. He pressed his fingertips to his temple, and with the other hand, he slapped Ikkaku soundly around the face. "Don't _ever_ say that again," he commanded furiously.

Ikkaku flinched. "Ugh- hell, Yumichika," he muttered, groaning and clutching his bloody head. The Hollow's blunt claws had left deep gorge marks. Ikkaku twitched. "Yumichika..."

"What?"

"Fuji Kujaku..."

Yumichika's eyes travelled away from Ikkaku's broken body. A few feet away lay his own Zanpakutō.

His heart sank.

The wood was splintered and the blade cracked, ruptured horribly under the Hollow's gigantic foot. And although it would heal with time, like all Zanpakutō, Yumichika knew that it would now _definitely_ feel justified to give him a sulky earful later. And he also kind of needed a Zanpakutō right now.

The Hollow gave a rumble behind them. "Enough," it snarled gutterally. "Fight now, Soul Reaper."

"It means you," Ikkaku grunted helpfully from the ground.

Painfully aware that he had no Zanpakutō but Ikkaku's, Yumichika swallowed, mouth dry. "Yeah," he agreed. "But I don't have anything to fight it with."

Ikkaku fell silent. Then, suddenly, he growled, "Use Hōzukimaru."

A shock ran through Yumichika. He opened his mouth, and Ikkaku's Zanpakutō suddenly felt heavy in his hands. "But its yours."

A rough, roguish smile played around Ikkaku's lips. "Well, yeah. So's my virginity, but I don't think you'd have a problem with taking that."

Yumichika stopped breathing for several moments, and went what he imagined was a very attractive shade of pink. Ikkaku noticed with some smugness, though, that he denied nothing.

The Hollow roared and raised its haunches in readiness to charge. "SOUL REAPER!" it bellowed.

"Okay!" Ikkaku coughed from the ground. "Whack him from me, Yumichika!" He tossed him Hōzukimaru's sheath, which Yumichika caught.

Narrowing his heavily adorned eyes, Yumichika turned and gripped Ikkaku's Zanpakutō and its sheath. "GROW," He plunged the hilt into the sheath, "HŌZUKIMARU!"

The Zanpakutō shot out as Yumichika drew it back. For a moment, he fumbled with the awkward, spear-like shape, noticing that it was a couple of feet shorter than Ikkaku's usual Shikai, but then he regained his balance. He aimed the blade at the Hollow.

The Hollow leapt, lashing out with its short forelegs and trying to crush Yumichika the same way it had Ikkaku. Yumichika ducked. He rolled, almost taking his eye out with Hōzukimaru, skidding under the creature, and clipped it lightly around the hind legs with the Zanpakutō. Before it could retaliate, Yumichika jumped onto its back. Furious, the Hollow whirled around, trying to throw off the Soul Reaper, who held on grimly with his thighs. He didn't dare take one hand off Hōzukimaru.

"_Use the other Shikai_!" cried Ikkaku, trying to stand up and failing again. "It's-"

"I've got it!" Yumichika yelled back. It was nice of him, but this was _Yumichika_ they were talking about - he had memorised the number of freckles on Ikkaku's left ankle, never mind his Zanpakutō's release command. "_Split, Hōzukimaru_!" He whirled Hōzukimaru around his head, feeling the staff split into three sections connected by a long chain.

"_SANSETSUKON_!" shouted Yumichika and Ikkaku at once.

Swiftly, deftly, but with all the clumsiness that comes with inexperience, Yumichika brought Hōzukimaru down. The Hollow bucked, thrashing wildly and grunting like an animal. Once more, Yumichika raised Ikkaku's blade and sliced it downwards to cleave the Hollow's skull in two.

The Hollow screeched and fell forward onto its face, twitching. Its mask shattered when it hit the ground, and shards of it rolled away like spilled beads, lost forever. Quickly, Yumichika slid from its back and grinned, hooking Hōzukimaru around his neck the way he had seen Ikkaku do thousands of times.

From the sky, a tiny, dark butterfly fluttered down towards them. Yumichika gazed at it, and then looked back down at the Hollow's remains. He nodded. "Hollow purification," he murmured, "begin."

As Yumichika made quick work of dispatching the Hollow's soul to Soul Society, Ikkaku finally got to his feet and staggered over, leaning heavily on the wall. Yumichika raised one eyebrow.

"Get back down," he said firmly. Ikkaku blinked, and Yumichika went on, "I mean it. On the floor. Now."

Ikkaku smirked painfully and wiped a trickle of blood out of his eye. "Okay, I know I said about the virginity thing, but I didn't mean right here, right now."

Scarlet-eared, Yumichika averted his eyes and finished up with the Hollow. "I meant _rest_," he muttered. He looked back at the gashes on Ikkaku's scalp despite himself. Before long he realised that he was just staring and awkwardly met Ikkaku's gaze instead. "...So when did you learn to read minds?"

Ikkaku grinned sheepishly. He leaned back against the wall and looked up at the sky. "'Bout the same time I learned how interesting it was to fake sleep."

"Oh."

"Yeah." For a moment, Ikkaku's eyes flickered to Yumichika, then he busied himself dabbing at the gouges on his head, looking very carefully in the opposite direction. "Y'know... If you want to, you can."

For some reason, Yumichika suddenly felt very hot and then very cold. "I can... what?"

Ikkaku's gaze drifted to Hōzukimaru, which was still in Yumichika's hand. "You can give me back my Zanpakutō," he suggested. As Yumichika jumped and moved to return it, he added very quickly, "And then you can kiss me."

Yumichika halted. Hōzukimaru clattered to the ground.

Right.

Okay.

That wasn't a brain-overload at all.

"Was that permission or a request?" he asked lightly, only half-joking. His palms were sweating slightly.

Ikkaku didn't look at him. His voice stayed very serious. "That was a demand."

"Oh," said Yumichika. He stepped closer to Ikkaku, who was still being careful to look at him only out of the corner of his eye. Now that the distance between them was so small, he could smell the blood glistening on Ikkaku's head. A very faint crimson coloured his neck, and his hands were shaking slightly.

Ah. He was so cute.

Quick as a flash, Yumichika smiled and pressed a kiss to his cheek. Then he darted away and rescued Ruri'iro Kujaku (who was probably feeling quite huffy and neglected by now) from the ground.

Ikkaku's whole head went bright red, like a ridiculous round, glowing beacon. He bent down and retrieved Hōzukimaru. One hand touched the place that Yumichika had kissed. "...That was really girly, y'know that?"

Yumichika turned and cocked his head. "You want girly? I can do a lot more girly than that."

"Actually, I kind of wanted manly..."

"Oh, right. So you want to be the girl?"

"Uhh... That would be embarrassing, so no."

"Are you saying I'm not manly?"

"Yes."

"Oh, _I_ see." Yumichika flitted back over to Ikkaku and, before he could lose his nerve, kissed him full on the mouth. It was fleeting and unexpected and took both of them a few moments to realise what was happening, but when Yumichika pulled back both Soul Reapers were grinning stupidly.

"Okay, that was manly," Ikkaku admitted, rubbing the back of his neck.

And Yumichika looked at him, bald and torn and red and bleeding and generally very unattractive, and he smiled and took his hand. "So you're the girl, yes?"

* * *

"C-C-_Captain_!"

Renji burst into Byakuya's room, terror etched on his face. His Zanpakutō was sealed, and all else seemed calm, so the sixth division's leader met his lieutenant with an unimpressed look. "What is it?"

"I-it's Ikkaku and Yumichika," gasped Renji, eyes popping. He took a few moments to draw breath and calm himself. "They've just got back, and they're- they're-" He paused dramatically, "_grinning like idiots_!"

Silence.

Renji flailed wildly, trying desperately to impart the gravity of the situation. "Like- like _absolute morons_!"

Byakuya said nothing.

"W-well, everyone knows what _that_ means!" Renji spluttered. "Don't you, Captain?"

"...Well, of course I do," Byakuya turned back to his Jinzen. "Is that all?"

"Wha-" Renji's mouth dropped open. "But- what- it's- Captain!"

"...Shut up, Renji..."

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_There. I thought the ending might be too full-on cheese, so I called in Renji to save the day. Hope you enjoyed it!_


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